Mr. Romero begins with a philosophical query into the nature of human behavior under stress, as I perceive it, his dead films follow through on questions of human response to disaster & duress. His observation in cinema form fits the model of modern cable news cycles. Think about the ubiquitous distant spotlight on news anchors knee-deep in the fire, flood, terror, tragedy. Slowburn zombies are the stars today, and despite the occasionally mediocre elements,

SURVIVAL OF THE DEAD could absolutely play in black & white, as an old time 1950s creature feature. Something new and something old, that’s exactly what I crave for modern horror. Romero continues legit academic scholarship in the field of the literature of the living dead. 3/5 cannibals in cowboy hats.

I’m fittin’ to attend the annual Fantastic Fest – a crazy-disorienting film festival that prides itself on screening nuttin’ but wonderfully offensive sci-fi, horror, shock cinema. As the word “annual” would suggest, this 8-day film showcase takes place yearly in AUSTIN, TX, USA, EARTH.

Zombieland production still

Once again my significant other and I opted for VIP badges, which come with the hefty pricetag of admission (just under $300) but are no doubt always worth it. In fact, this is the only large film festival we attend because we prefer the company of the film-savy gore hounds who frequent the Alamo Drafthouse.

The best thing about Fantastic Fest is that unlike Sundance, Toronto, Cannes, etc. you ain’t gonna find no corporate industry goons lurking around, hunting for the next commercially successful prime time, video game, cereal box franchise. Yup, no one’s out to buy. It’s just the fans.

Zombies, now more than eva…
Not sure if the living dead-obsessed public knows it, but we got a zombie renaissance going on here:

1. Zombieland – Amateur “Cheers” bartender,  Woody Harrelson beats zombies with style and grace.
2. The Revenant – One dead Iraq War veteran returns home to the states to fuck shit up.
3. [REC 2] – Note the first [REC] (2007) remains awesome and then some. Although to enjoy the film, one must read the Castilian lisp-heavy dialog with Spanish subtitles. So…what followed the next year was a soulless shot-for-shot Hollywood remake called Quarantine (‘cus we Americans can’t read them squiggly words what spell). Yes, I’m excited about this! Damnit, the original freaked my shit out without the hindrance of any boring expositions, explanations, or expected plot conventions.
4. Doghouse – A cannibal disease sweeps through a small British town predominantly populated by women. Coincidentally, some sexist dudes decide to travel to this same town in the hopes of gettin’ totally laid. Looks like buckets o’ blood and gore a plenty!
5. Survival of the Dead – Veteran zombie auteur George Romero goes for the 1-2 punch after his redemptive Diary of the Dead, which happened to premiere at the 2007 Fantastic Fest. I actually got to meet this creative giant (literally & figuratively). Mr. Romero was friendly, articulate and chill, an impressive feat in the face of an army of anxious fanboy zombie nerds. Speaking of which, I had the opportunity to ask (or axe) the man a question that had been bothering me:

REC production still

Me: “Do your zombies ever die or starve to death due to the eventual exhaustion of their food resources.”

George: “In my films, I will never answer that question. I think that is one of those fill-in-the-blanks we must each individually resolve on our own.”

At first I found this an unsatisfying response until a friend later explained her theory on zombie longevity. She said, “Zombies are simply the new dominant species. Humans had their chance…” Basically claiming a new biological paradigm enters with the arrival of the zombie apocalypse and the rapid demise of the human race.

Regardless of your personal theories on undead biology, stay tuned. I’m going to be reviewing the above zombie films and more from upcoming Fantastic Fest 2009.

EXHIBIT A: Lucio Fulci’s slowmo voodoo zombie flick comonly known as ZOMBI.

It must be noted that human meat post-zombitization must taste like delicious meat popsicles. Similar to the process of curing meat, the undead body becomes like a walking stick of hickory smoked turkey jerky as a human crosses over and becomes a living corpse.

MMMM. That’s scrumptious zombie!

Left unanswered in the film:
How terrifying would a zombie shark be? Pretty damn frighting is the correct answer.

Beyond the non sequitur shark fight, ZOMBI remains awesome.

Still from ZOMBI: Nothing tenser than a slow eye gouging!

Respect to the Italians who saw what Romero’s NIGHT OF THE LIVING DEAD and grew the horror galaxy with some of the best gore in cinema history  (re: history’s longest anxiety provoking eye-gouge). Not to omit the eye bleeding found in Fulci’s GATES OF HELL. You don’t see a lot of spontaneous eye bleeding these days, and I’m unsure why….like the frequency of maggots used as props in horror movies. ZOMBI contains its fair share of sleepy zombies lumbering around covered with gross-but-benign fly larva.

So to finally end the discuss: Yes, there is indeed a perfectly good reason why a voodoo style zombie and shark would get all caught up in fisticuffs. Zombies are tasty. You’re just too busy running for your life to sample a bite.

So why wouldn’t the zombies just eat themselves all day? Good question. Well, like junk food, undead flesh is delectable but lacks all of the nutritional properties of healthy living human flesh. Guh!

I also have to root for really slow zombies. They’re really working hard for their meal. Keep on crawling, Mr. Torso Zombie, you’ll get there eventually.

Land of the Dead poster

George primarily sticks with what he knows. Commentaries on social & economic class warfare get delivered in dump truck-sized doses. The wealthy few have managed to hole themselves up in a mall/condo/high rise called Fidler’s Green, an island protected by water on all sides, all made possible by Kaufman (the enterprising capitalist played by the impossibly difficult Dennis Hopper). Everyone else who managed to survive this long is relegated to the drug and disease-ridden slums surrounding Fidler’s Green.

John Lequizombie

As an aside, exactly one month before the June 2005 release of LAND OF THE DEAD, the ensemble genre blending hip-hop troupe THE GORILLAZ released DEMON DAYS which rocks. And how could the album suck with guest spots from some of the industry’s greatest: MF DOOM, Dangermouse, Roots Manuva and Del tha Funky Homosapien to name a few? With heavy sampling of tracks from GOBLIN and Dario Argento’s music

composition from the original DAWN OF THE DEAD (1978), DEMON DAYS remains an impressive tribute to zombie myth and culture. In addition to overt z-tracks like LAST LIVING SOULS, the album contained a strange song called FIRE COMING OUT OF THE MONKEY’S HEAD, which is basically a dark fairy tale narrated by weirdo alien-sent-to-earth Dennis Hopper.

As Romero expands on his own zombie mythos, braking previously established rules, as the undead learn to communicate with gestures and problem solve while mastering tools and weapons. Romero implies that zombies feel empathy towards each other and simply desire to survive. Damn those zombie peaceniks!

While he occasionally employs gorgeous gore via timeless practical effects, Romero opts for CGI more than ever before, with questionable results which already show their age. George returns to the basics in DAIRY OF THE DEAD but will no doubt be forever haunted by the melodramatic z-parody that is John Leguizombie’s performance.